Rampant Lesbianism

Currently Listening To: Violent Pornography by System of a Down
So this afternoon, I saw The Brave One (I'm going to skip over the part where I visited yet again the college that I've realized is almost as awesome as the other one I want to go to). It was a reeeeeeally good movie (the ending was a tad cheesy, but I'll let it slide).

But while I was walking out of the theater, I realized something:

I am a lesbian.

I'll shout it from my computer chair: I am a lesbian. I'm currently downloading the complete works of Melissa Ethridge.

Why am I a lesbian? Because I'm a sucker for movies about how men are spineless and the only people capable of taking control of a bad situation are women. Panic Room, Red Eye, Flightplan, Resident Evil, Nightmare on Elm Street series (Jesse had to get his gal-pal to do all the work for him)... All movies that could end up on Lifetime, which is now the only channel on my satellite; I called DirecTV and told them to cancel all the others.

Anyways, my love for these corny women-kicking-ass movies obviously means I'm a lesbian. Or a radical feminist. Or a chauvinist.

Or it means something completely different. I know it means something.

Wait, do you have to be a chick to be a lesbian?

Got all worked up for nothing.