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Originally uploaded by CliveDangerously.

From a recent project in my graphic design class; we had to design (for a contest) a logo for google depicting a what-if scenario...

...This was mine.

I'm not a bad person. I swear. And the booze not looking too accurate may have to do with my non-drinking... I've actually never seen vodka outside of a bottle, nor have I ever seen a martini 'in the flesh'.

Feelin' Like Dying

Currently Listening To:
Not so much in the emo, hate-my-life sense so much as the might-die-at-some-point-during-the-night-but-at-least-then-I-won't-be-in-so-much-pain kind. First, I'm sick. I think I've got a cold, or something. Maybe tuberculosis. My lungs hurt a lot. That's generally bad.

WAIT, WHY THE FUCK DOES MICHAEL BAY GET TO VOTE ON BEST PICTURE? GAH, FUCK THAT.

Anyways, sick. Oscars. Atonement got fucked twice since I started watching two categories ago. I didn't see Michael Clayton, but I for-real think that No Country for Old Men is vastly overrated. What the hell were they talking about? I mean seriously, what were they getting at? Yeah, Bardem was scary as hell, but at the end of the day (er, movie), you're left quite unfulfilled. Two hours and you end up nowhere. Atonement actually had some character point-A-to-B action that wasn't 'defeat'.

I suppose the Atonement poster hanging next to my TV would be a good indicator of my bias.

And I think the only reason Enchanted is the main event for best song is because Disney and ABC are pretty much the same entity.

Anyways, sick. Death. Feel like death.

KILL ME NOW.

In other news:

• Finished a twelve page (that ended up being less than twelve, but Claire did the same so maybe we'll be spared?)
• Visited Sewanee. For a multitude of reasons, I'm for-sure going there next year. The lack of cellphone reception is a plus. I fucking hate cellphones.
• Got in the Spring play, which will be my last at the Dar. Daniel got in as well, but Dane didn't, which is a shame, because we really wanted a nice farewell for the Big Three, but it's so different than the drama program was sophomore and junior years that I guess it was doomed to be different; it looks like we'll be practicing five (or more) days a week instead of the standard four, as well as going considerably longer than in the past. Don't get me wrong, I like our director, it's just that it's different. To quote some asshole who doesn't even warrant credit because of how worn out this cliche is, "The only thing that is constant is change"
• I'm applying for a summer job. I'm going to try to stay low key about it so as to not jinx it, which shows just how mature I am.
• I rented disc one of Dexter yesterday. It was so good, and definitely worth the two dollars I paid for it, except the fact that BLOCKBUSTER ONLINE MOVIES ARE SUPPOSED TO BE REDEEMABLE FOR A FREE IN-STORE RENTAL. That means that when I take in a movie and exchange it for disc one of Dexter, I should Dexter for free. Because that was the agreement when we signed up. That's why we signed up. It was the one advantage over Netflix. But now that there's a finite number. Pure shenanigans. Let's review: my dad opted for Blockbuster Online because we could trade the envelopes at our Blockbuster for a free rental, a service Netflix did not 9and still diesn't) provide. Now, Blockbuster has reneged on that service. So, the services offered by Blockbuster and those provided by Netflix are...
  

I'll let you do the rest.

And those links are to previous posts where I ripped on Blockbuster, or just it into my Blockbuster saga. There is, of course, more, if you search 'Blockbuster' in the search bar up top. Try it. It'll be fun.

Movie Rants

Currently Listening To: Nicotine and Gravy by Beck
Went to the theater tonight with pa. Out of the eight times I've been to a movie so far this year, it was only the second with him, which is the opposite of how it usually is. Driving has pretty much cut off whatever sort of relationship I had with my parents aside from college/school talk and me hitting them up for cash. And the "Why didn't you call? We thought you were dead in a ditch" convos.

CineBitch has devolved quickly into my awkward relationships with my parents, and how I pretty much am unable to, you know, connect with them at all.

Anyways, back to CineBitch:

• First was the parking dilemma. It wasn't much of a dilemma at first; I saw a spot in the packed lot, pulled in, pulled out, pulled back in again... You get the drill. We were late, so I wasn't exactly careful (though most of the time I just park without any sort of regard for white lines). Anyways, we get out of the car and walk toward the theater. Just before I round the corner, a gaggle of cops I hadn't noticed sarcastically comment to my dad about my parking job. I sarcastically waved back in appreciation and kept walking. But the thing is, nothing's ever that simple for my dad. I kept walking and he didn't. Now, normally, I would have been embarrassed and told him to just scrape the cheese off the burger or whatever. He's a bit of a customer service nightmare. But this time I didn't mind, mostly because my driving skills had been cast into doubt by the authorities, something which hadn't occurred since I failed the driving test. After a bit of a squawk (in which plot twist it was revealed that I was 100% in between the lines), my dad moved the car to another, now-vacant spot. While walking back, he observed these cops watch someone else pull into our old spot and remark about how it was a tight squeeze and everyone was trying it tonight.

DIIIIIIICKS. Seriously. They're paid to keep the peace (which, when they're at the theater, means the pay is coming out of the higher ticket prices), and all they can do is stand in a group at side of the theater where nothing remotely suspicious is going on, then mother guard a small parking spot? Again, DIIIIIIICKS.

• Next, why the hell do we need rent-a-cops at the theater? You might say, "Oh, redneck goth kids are troublemakers". You'd be wrong. They loiter, but that's it. You want to know the verifiable conspiracy at play? The theater owners only get the guards when a movie aimed at a black audience opens. Seriously. All the Tyler Perry movies. Stomp the Yard. Big Momma's House 2. What have you. And I'll be damned if there's ever an actual incident. Again, you might say, "But the kids are on their best behavior because the cops are there!" Wrong again. May I point you again to the rent-a-cops huddled by the side door judging parking maneuvers?
• Finally, how come so many of the movies I've seen this year didn't have endings? Both Cloverfield (x3, one for each time I saw it) and No Country for Old Men left me hanging, meaning that p=.5 when it comes to movies I saw this year not being finished.

The good of today's good/bad? My 90's CDs arrived today: Midnite Vultures by Beck, Presidents of the United State's self-titled album, Offspring's Americana (which Robert bought when he was in like 3rd grade, but the disc has since gone missing), Bush's Science of Things and Spacehog's Resident Alien. I'm still waiting on Beck's Mutations, though. It's all good.

Other than that, I've just been hanging out lately. Learning lots of new things about learning about life. Such as:

• If, in K-Mart, you hear "Code 19 in furnitures", it means that some kids are doing the Lord's Prayer in round at a patio table.
• A scarf and bug eyed sunglasses on a cherub face such as mine are effective in convincing various people that I'm a hot, hot lady. Seriously. Those dudes were totally checking me out at the red light near the hospital.
• I would rather stick my hand into a beehive for 45 minutes than go to a select few of my classes at school. Those classes are also the ones with juniors/non-seniors in them. Coincidence? I think not. Non-seniors ask inane questions and need everything explained multiple times in progressively simpler words. I have grown to loathe many of the juniors in my classes.
• A school wide drug test would cost the school upward of $30k, thus dispelling the rumor that paralyzed our school with fear last week, and which may have started with me (though I honestly wasn't trying to start shit... honest)

Now, bed.

STORY TIME!

Currently Listening To: Odelay (the album) by Beck
Once upon a time, there was young man. This young man had many lucrative career opportunities as a result of his chosen major during his college days. He was in a relationship with a girl who loved him very much, and he loved her too. He lived in an apartment that was reasonably priced, quite spacious and in a great location. He had a very healthy relationship with all members of his family.

The end.

I should become a novelist, what with my gripping story lines?

I love Odelay. It is probably my favorite thing right about now. Things that aren't my favorite include Pad Thai, going back to school tomorrow and Pad Thai in my tummy. Pad Thai is the worst fucking decision I made yesterday. I can only pray that death comes quickly, in the same way that, at least according to the Pet Shop Boys, love comes.

Not Impressed

Currently Watching: Commercials (with men running into each other for thirty seconds every once in a while)
Super Bowl commercials.


Ah.


Some are good, some are great, some just completely fall flat.


And some are astonishingly... "Huh?"


Case in point: Tonight's Under Armor commercial. All I can remember (which is also bad) is at the end, a guy on a balcony was bellowing at a large crowd below, fists shaking in the air, while large red banners with the Under Armor logo flew in the background. Listen, ad execs, your cinema professor in college may have rubbed it off to Triumph of the Will, but most Americans aren't out to appreciate cinematography and whatnot. They see Nazi imagery and think Nazis, and nothing else.

Truly.

And I saw a girl at school on Friday (on our first casual day of the year) wearing a shirt that said "Frankie says relax". Hey, kids, I've got bad news. It's a counterfeit. Frankie say relax, not says. Take it back to Target, or even worse, Urban Outfitters (because if you got it there, you paid like twenty bucks more than at Target and it's still fake).