Monday, January 29, 2007

Scream


Scream
Originally uploaded by CliveDangerously.
Buh-graw! I really love this picture. And I love myself, so if I REALLY love a picture of something I really love, you know it's good. Oh, basketball games. So much fun. Crazy grandma, Aaron Carter... Good times. And the dodgeball tourney was fun too. At least to watch. We'll be in it next year, and when I say we, I mean all the cool kids. We will come in second place, just to piss everyone off; both those who want us to fail, and those who want us to succeed, seeing as we're the underdog. Or since I live in Joja, underDAWG. Dee-Eh?-Dubya-Gee. Damn I hate this state. Well, just that school, and all those associated with it. So pretty much everyone. Oh, the angst.

So today, the Senior Speaker in chapel quoted Little Miss Sunshine, and then dissed the entire school. SWEET. And then Rumpus reared its ugly head. Man, screw Rumpus.

Sunday, January 28, 2007

Me? A Soul? No Way!

Currently Listening To: Ketang by Kasabian
There was an event at school that I am shocked and appalled at myself for forgetting; Cosgrove got expelled.

I hate Cosgrove. To me, he's just a colossal asshole. I've been awful to him, but that was long after he was even worse to me. And even when we were "cool", he still treated me like shit. But despite this, I feel really, really bad for him. Getting expelled, no matter how you look at it, isn't something you want on your college application. So because of a stupid mistake... At the age of seventeen... He has to live with the consequences, and the consequences of those consequences five, ten and twenty years on down the road? Where is the justice in that? Sure, he screwed up, and in a huge way, but no one deserves that. Not even Cosgrove.

I was (unfortunately) talking to a gnome who rides THE BUS about it. This little trog has succeded, in his five-or-so months of going to school here, in making just about everyone hate him; let me tell you, people don't make fun of him because he is short, they use his height as a means of teasing him because he is an obnoxious know-it-all. So far, I've avoided tossing any height jokes at him, but that makes me in the minority. I still argue with him pretty much every day on the bus, but try not to sully my fantastic reputation by saying, "Shut up, midget" as a comeback.
Cosgrove, however, called him that... pretty much all the time. So I was talking with other people on the bus/arguing with the little guy, and when that came up, he expressed a fair bit of happiness. I suppose I can understand that, but then I posed the question I asked above: Does anyone really deserve that? He said, of course, "because he was mean to me". Aside from the fact that that is incredibly egotistical to say, that's just ridiculous. I said, "Should one mistake before you can even vote dictate the entire rest of your life?" Being the irrational moron that he is, he responded, "Yes." Being the quick venom-spitter that I am, I immediately said, "That sounds very Republican of you," put my headphones on and looked in the other direction. I am very mature, as you can see.
I guess I should elaborate on the Republican comment. Earlier, he had been talking about how great a job Bush was doing. Pretty much everyone agreed when I said that that was pure poppycock and he said I was sounding like a Democrat. Psh.

Saturday, January 27, 2007

Communism

Currently Listening To: Social by Squirtgun (Mallrats soundtrack!)

So this morning... The SATs. Damn, son.

First of all, they said to show up at 7:45 so it could start at 8. I get there at 7:45. The line goes straight out the door. What the frack? We didn't start until like 8:30 or something. That shit is pure poppycock. So then we begin the laborious task of writing letters and numbers in boxes and filling the bubbles accordingly. YAWN. And finally, we took the test...

The essay. When I first heard about "THE ESSAY", I immediately hated it, just because I didn't want to write an essay. At that point (I was but a freshman; I had yet to blossom into a really cool guy) I had no confidence whatsoever in my writing skills because of Herr Schmidtler's class. But anyways, now I know why I hate "THE ESSAY": you get 25 minutes to write it. That would be fine if there was a specific topic. We do in class essays at school... sometimes. But when it's just like, "Unsourced quote... DISCUSS. CITE EXAMPLES FROM TINGS YOU DONE READED", we have an issue. So basically, I just pull shit out of my ass that I learned in Herr Schmidtler's class. OH TEH IRONEESS!!!1!
I'd say my topic, but we had to sign a written statment (in cursive; fuck cursive, I haven't used that shit since 8th grade, and before that, primary school) saying we wouldn't discuss it until we got our scores back. Dane, Daniel, Shauna and I still talked about it at lunch, though. Daniel said mine was very, very Marxist. Ooops. FAIL'D!

So yeah, lunch at Duffy's Deli. I saw a girl I knew there working (actually, she made my sandwich...) and I felt like I had been a total dick to her. I should call her and offer my apologies, but I am a dick, so I will not. And I ate some Cheetos. I disgust myself. If you want to gain a hundred pounds in a week, eat a Cheeto. Damnit, I am a whore.

So, in review. I am a Communist, fat-ass dick.

Sunday, January 21, 2007

Bitchy Comments Of The Week

Currently Mildly Paying Attention To: Crank
Two comments I overheard this week that really burned me up:
  • "Shut up, at least I believe in something!" Where to start, where to start... How about YOU PRETENTIOUS BITCH. SHUT THE FUCK UP. This was part of an exchange during lunch between a stuck-up, Catholic bitch and a freshman. I side with the freshman, so I didn't describe him in a negative light. Anyways, they were talking about... Something (I wasn't in the conversation). The fact that he was a fifteen year old athiest who has figured everything out came up, and he later said something negative about Catholicism or something, and then I realized that this story is falling apart. Anyways, don't believe in anything for the sake of being better than anyone else. At that point you're a jackass that would do him or herself, along with everyone else, some good by jumping from a great height down on to a strategically-placed bed of nails. Eff you, bia.
  • "Just so you know, I do not want to be doing this." Yesterday, our family engaged in some mandatory yard labor. Somebody didn't want to spread pinestraw, and somebody made sure everyone knew. I'm sorry, but I didn't realize that somebody was a spoiled, Buckhead-dwelling, stuck-up, "my-nails-ain't-dry" bitch. Hey Kelley, those jeans are sixty fucking dollars*; don't get them! Let me assure you, an hour of spreading pine straw in the front lawn never did anyone any harm. I speak from experience. I went above the required ten bales and did FOURTEEN. Suck on that, bia.

One thing I love to do when with my dad is talk about radio. My dad used to enjoy listening to the radio here in Atlanta. I'm sure many people did. But the dark cloud of asshole corporate suits in New York and Los Angeles came in and decided that the dumb hicks here needed only certain types of stations and completely raped the radio industry here. He is kind of bitter about the whole thing, and if you bring it up, he will go on and on. I love listening to him rant and rave.

*Today, while shopping at teh GAPzorz, somebody wanted a pair of jeans, but was simply above the clearance rack, which the rest of the family picked from. That pair of jeans cost as much as everything else combined, which included several pairs of boxers, two t-shirts, a button down, a classy pair of slacks and some shit my other sister bought. Fuck if I know what that was. Girl shit, I guess. The Kelley thing is from the Shoes video, and has replaced Paris Hilton as somebody's supposed idol.

Borat in 30 Seconds with Bunnies! (click)

Currently Watching: Saved!
So yeah, check it out. It pretty much captures the spirit of the movie, but that left out the iPod line.

So I'm going to see the Hitcher today. I haven't seen the 80s version, but I can almost guarantee it'll be no good. Whatever.

...Not much else to say. I just felt like posting the Borat link.






Dead air.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Can Feel My Mouth Once More

Currently Listening To: For Us by Pete Yorn
I went to the dentist today. I don't mind the dentist. If you look back at my first five posts, one of them is about my TRUE mortal enemy, orthodontia. Dentistry is acceptable. Besides, I got to miss two classes today. Any day when I get to miss my English class is a success. So anyways, we get to the dentist and I go sit down; everything is normal. Then the dentist shows up. I open my mouth, because it's, well, the dentist. That's what you do. But then he starts swabbing my gums with this funky shit, followed by a needle. My mouth goes numb. The nurse (Is that what they're called? I think they have a special title, but they are basically nurses) asks me if I'm okay, since I wasn't saying anything.



Oh. Fuck.



Nothing can make someone feel less okay than "Are you okay?" except for something like "Your puppy just fell into a tree shredder." That would straight up ruin your day. Anyways, needles in my gums. Oh snap. I was just expecting a check-up, not this shit. And what is this shit? The entire time, I was thinking "I'm getting a root canal BY MISTAKE." I've never wanted to be one of those people on those "Botched Medicine" shows, and that was about to be me. The two of them fiddle around a bit in my mouth with Hostel-esque tools. Then he leaves. The nurse-lady takes this time to attempt to instill more confidence in me in this situation, again causing me to lose conifdence. I hate needles. He could be injecting me with undilluted liquid awesome and I still wouldn't go for it.

Long story short, it turns out I was getting a cavity filled. Psh. No big deal. Not like it was visible. Were the needles entire necesary? I can distinctly recall getting one filled in like second grade, with no needles, no sketchy swabs, and some disgusting pineapple flavor. What is this, Hell? Oh wait, super-conservative metro Atlanta is the border between Hell and Atlanta.

Thursday, January 11, 2007

SEIZURE

Currently Watching: Scrubs

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Dream Journal 4

Currently Listening To: Stockholm Syndrome by MUSE
This one was...



My hands were made of bacon and I ate them. I was picking at my fingernails, and I lifted one up somehow, which revealed bacon. Raw bacon. And I ate it. What the hell? That makes no sense. I can devise a meaning from the rest, but this... This is ridiculous.

Monday, January 08, 2007

Dream Journal 3

Currently Listening To: This Is Everything by Tegan and Sara (Yes, I am an angry lesbian rawker)
So I had another really, really weird dream. But this time, there was no teleportation or anything. It was weird because my dream was a teenage romance movie. The "movie" starts off with me eating dinner with this girl. This is, in fact, a real girl, who I will not name for one reason or another. If you get really curious, leave me a comment and I'll e-mail you. Anyways, we're eating at a Panera-type place. We get to talking about a mutual friend, who is on a date. "Speaking of dates," I say, "What are you doing on Saturday?"
"Going on a date with you." (or something like that)
So we do. It's great. The two of us are really happy together. The next slice of the dream is the "happy relationship" montage. We do happy-relationship things, like go on dates and enjoy ourselves. We progress six months or so. I am sitting at my computer, burning a CD. It finishes and I put it in an envelope. At this point, I don't know what's on it. But when she recieves it and listens to it, I realize what songs are on it. The first is "Some Day You Will Be Loved" by Death Cab. The rest are in a similar vein. I never speak to her again.

I really have become a chick.

Our new English teacher is simply ridiculous. He really doesn't realize we can read. I assure you, what Saunders did is far outweighed by the underestimation of the entire class. I mean, he didn't end up in jail. What more can you ask for? We spent like three days on one poem, which was pretty cut-and-dry, since poems now only mean exactly what they say.

I keep seeing commercials for Epic Movie, and it looks funny, but they need to stop trying to act like these movies are really making fun of the genre in the title. Regardless of your political/social views, Brokeback and 8 Mile weren't horror, and Borat was anything but epic.

Sunday, January 07, 2007

ANIMEme


ANIMEme
Originally uploaded by CliveDangerously.
From this weekend, down in the ATL at Jackie's house for Matt's birthday. We were talking about anime... or something... and I did this pose. Great story, I know.