I give up. There's obviously no one left reading this shit-ass site. I quit. I'm officially becoming a goth.







Not really. Just wanted to prove I wasn't dead.

everyone sucks

When I informed my Spanish teacher of my theory on Kerry and Bush, that rat bastard said it wasn't funny. How dare I claim that his precious Kerry and the evil, nature-destroying Bush were one in the same? I'm shocked that I could do something so shameful.

Does anyone else love it how whomever someone plans on voting for is like a God who can do no wrong, yet the other candidate(s) and their respective parties are morons/poor people/smelly hippies? NEWS FLASH: Kerry may have done some bad stuff in the past, but guess what, so has Bush. And yes, Bush has told some lies in his carrer, but guess what, so has Kerry. Hence ye olde Englishe spelling of the word 'politician', poLIEticiane. It's in their resume; it's the first question: "Are you a lying sack of crap?" And if you answer no, you must be Nader. I mean, you can't be a politician. Kerry tried to get out of 'Nam ASAP and Bush dodged the drafts, but who can blame them? Bush fans make it sound like Kerry was a pussy for trying to get out, and Kerry fans make it sound like Bush's a bigger pussy for dodging altogether, but it's not like it was a fucking tea party over there. People were having there damn heads blown off and being blown to bits by little guys hiding in trees. Those guys were like fucking Ewoks of soemthing, battling the 'evil empire', which brings me to my next subject: ignorant European assholes on the internet who claim that all Americans are war-monging, gun-toting, fat-ass redneck Bush fans. I can proudly say that only one of those applies to me(guess which one?). I suppose it never occured to those Euro-bastards that, just like they aren't all womanly socialist wine-drinking cowards, not all Americans like Bush, are fat, like war, tote guns, etc. Kinda ironic, eh? Claiming we're all ignorant while showcasing their own ignorance.


I'll be back to bitch'n'moan s'more in a few hours, next time about the bastardous institution know as school.

All Of My Readers Are Dead

Kinda depressing, isn't it? No sign of life in a few weeks.

My first post sin title. That was Spanish. Spanish is great, save for Spanish homework, teachers and classes. But other than that, I love Spanish.

I've been thinking about posting some pictures of me so you can see the nerd behind the bitching and moaning.

And I think this is my 50th post, but I'm not sure because the damn post counter is lazy.

Hey kids, it's conspiracy theory time!

Remember that episode of the Simpsons(Treehouse of Horror 7: Citizen Kang) where Homer discovers that the presidential candidates have been replaced by Kang and that other alien, and that regardless of whom you vote for, the world would still be enslaved? No? Well, that's too damn bad. But anyways, what if John Kerry and George Bush are the same person? Some evil millionaire probably created the two characters, their likenesses and their backgrounds and entered the two fakes into the election. That way, when you vote for Bush, you're also voting for Kerry and therefore contributing to the downfall of human civilization. That's right- a vote for Bush or Kerry is a vote for enslavement of humanity at the hands of an evil millionaire. My conclusion? Vote for Nader. Or write in a new candidate (if possible). Hu Flung Pu for prez in 2k4!


Yes, that was lifted from Conan. So sue me. No, don't. I haven't got much money to begin with. But I can give you Ramen noodles. Who doesn't love Ramen noodles? Homeless people, college students and homeless college students everywhere LOVE Ramen noodles. And so do I, despite not falling into any of those categories.

Leave My Weekend Alone

Well, I've actually got something to complain about this time. What might that be? People planning my weekend for me. Yesterday, had to go to some poor(not financially, in case you're wondering; I said poor because he's dead) old guy's funeral to carry the cross in front of the coffin, but when my dad and I got there, someone had already stepped in to do it. So we get to go home, right? No, we have to stay and wait to see if they needed us to put the coffin into the ground. It turned out that the answer was 'no', but we had to wait an hour to find out. After that, we went to pick up my brother from that Sylvan place(not just for retards, he tells us). We got there when we were supposed to, but they weren't quite done, so we had to wait around for an hour. Fortunately, we had just enough time to stop into Barnes and Noble to buy the Dawn of the Dead on DVD, which I got to watch this morning. Anyways, we picked up my brother and went home after getting lunch for him and his girlfriend(I didn't know she was at the house, nor did I know that she had been there for more than 15 hours). Then, my dad said we had just enough time to go to the movie theater and see Shaun of the Dead, which was hysterical, and was the second high point of the day. When we got back home, we had to drive up to Rome, GA to go to the county fair. Both my dad and I agreed that it was quite lame and definitely a waste of the few hours we spent there. And the haunted house, oh, the haunted house, was horrendously lame. It was just like on that episode of the Simpsons where Bart and Lisa go into the lame haunted house. After that, we waited for my brother's girlfriend's parents to arrive and pick those two up. We got home at about 11.

This morning, I found out that my dad and I have to go to the rector or whatever from our church's house to do yard work. She's been sick for the past few weeks and her yard is quite out of shape. I'm not complaining about helping a sick woman out. I'm complaining about how not one of the deadbeats from our church could go over there and help out. That's what I hate about my church; the deadbeats. It feels like a few families are always there having to do all the work that an assload of lazy families can't find time to do. What's that? You and your husband have your hands full with your two middle-school age children? My parents have four kids, and they manage to do all the things they signed up for AND the jobs you f***ers signed up to do and couldn't. Lazy people aren't the problem. People who sign up for things they don't plan on doing are. If I were in charge, all of those people would be cast into an active volcano.



Wait a second... Mount Saint Helen. Mount St. Helen! Mister Bush! Redeem yourself NOW! This is a perfect opportunity to make America the perfect land it once had the potential to be! Kill the deadbeats for a stronger America! Cast them into the eternal fire!



All of this on top of my huge amounts of homework. Thanks a bunch.

Important Public Service Announcement

Every time you self pleasure, a kitten drops dead.

Are you responsible for the death of innocent felines? I'm not.

I just saw a great quote on IMDB

It was on the message board for the movie Volcano, which wasn't that bad. It's just that the script writers probably went on to write speeches for Bush. Anyways, the quote went:
"Come on, at least this thing had Tommy Lee Jones rolling out a map on the hood of his car. He just does not get sick of that does he?"



Well, I thought it was funny. Shut up. Don't make me shove a large metal pipe down your throat. Cause I will. And there's only three more days until my birthday, but I have yet to see a gift from any of you bastards.

My sister was all sick and stuff today. She kept crying because she was gonna miss her school's "Fall Festival". Some day she'll be glad she missed that lame-ass waste of a day. Whoop-dee-friggin'-do, you got your hair spray painted. I love her and all, but it's really no big deal. And yes, I do realize that I probably loved going to that ass-tival when I was her age.


I just realized the perfect place to go in case of a zombie invasion: a Richard Simmons "concert" or whatever they call those things where all those fat people go to lose weight(and I don't mean people like me, I mean people who could rival Jabba the Hutt or Anna Nicole Smith as the fattest, most disgusting slug ever) and listen to ol' Richie have a friggin' orgasm on stage. Anyways, my reasoning would be that chances are they'd all be slower than me(save for Mr. Simmons) and the zombies would go for the easier prey, kinda like when you get chased by a bear; don't fret as long as someone slower than you is being chased too.

The theme for the home coming dance has been announced: dress up as your favorite decade. After I finished laughing hysterically for about twenty minutes and disrupting math class, I realized the endless possibilities: Devo, Kevin Bacon from Footloose, Anthony Michael Hall(from any one of his movies; it was just the same character), Johnny Depp from A Nightmare On Elm Street(the ladies would definitely be all-up-ons), any guy from the original Degrassi, Conan The Librarian(from UHF), are you still even reading this?, Jason Voorhees, the guy from Miami Vice, for still reading this you have no friends, Timothy Dalton, Jesse from Full House(no, wait, I won't...), Bill or Ted from... Bill and Ted, Ferris Bueller...

Oh, Canada!

I just figured out how to change the theme for Mozilla(yes, I'm quite technotarted). So... I set it to, you guessed it, Oh Canada! in honor of the season premiere of Degrassi, which I will be missing tonight for a(gag)football game and be forced to watch tomorrow due to my generosity. Basically, I lent a girl my notes for a Biology paper so she could go home and make copies for herself, but she was sick today and (obviously) couldn't get the papers back to me. But whatever. AND I got a ride home from school from a junior, which nearly eclipses my date to the prom with an actual female who's actually in 11th grade. Wow.


But, I need assistance. Does anyone know how to fix the colors on my computer? Every time I open Mozilla, the colors get really funky.

You're trapped in a room with a tiger, a rattlesnake, and a lawyer. You have a gun with two bullets. What should you do?

Shoot the lawyer. Twice.

Today we only went to school for two hours. And there was ZERO learning whatsoever. But it was mandatory school, so, you know, I would have prefered to not go at all. But whatever. I was still grateful for the much shortened school day.

Honest to God kids, I don't really know what to post for the rest of the... post. So I'll bang my head on the keyboard for a while.
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