CONSPIRACY!

THEORY!


So, here it is: You go to the dentist for your check-up and he "cleans" your teeth. But when I say "cleans", I really mean "sprays with yellow paint". So you think to yourself, "Damn, I have yellow teeth. I should brush them." So you bust out your toothbrush and toothpaste and "clean" your teeth. But when I say "clean", I really mean "apply a chemical that actually causes holes to appear in your teeth, which is the oppostie of what you want to do". So then you say, "CAVITY ALERT! HOLY SHIT!" and get in your car and drive your lazy ass on down to the dentist's office, where he fills your teeth with yellow fillings and "cleans" them again, keeping that vicious cycle moving until the day you die. That's why smoking makes your teeth brown. So you go to fix them at the dentist and buy toothpaste to give you fresh breath. And don't even get me started on that asshole more commonly known as "the orthodontist". That lowlife piece of dog shit really is just moving your yellow teeth so that you have to come back and get the teeth moved again. That's what you vain assholes get for wanting to look good.