Any Movie With A Guy Named Pillsbury Is Bound To Kick Ass

Currently Listening To: Hot Pursuit (Bonus Track from Europe) by the Bravery

The Samoan guy behind Asia Argento is Pillsbury, and boy is he a badass. I saw Land of the Dead last night, and I must say it was the coolest fucking movie, pretty much ever. It's my new favorite. A few reasons:
1. Lack Of Talentless Hacks That Everyone Loves Despite Their Talentless-Ness: The biggest stars in this movie were Dennis Hopper and John Legui... Leguizamo. I guess that's how it's spelled. And the only other person in the movie I recognized was Shawn Roberts, the rapist from Degrassi, which means that this movie, unlike, say, Madagascar, actually needed to have substance/awesome to be greenlighted. Madagascar relied on Ben Stiller and Chris Rock to make up for the lack of direction. Land of the Dead, on the other hand, relied on ass-kickery to make up for... Well, the ass-kickery was just there because every good movie has one form or another of ass-kickery. There were no flaws, except that they could have tacked on ten or so minutes of more ass-kickery just for the hell of it.
2. Plenty Of Awesome Names: The previously mentioned Pillsbury, Cholo, Slack, Mouse, Gus, Chihuahua. I mean, any movie worth watching has at least one good nickname in it, and this movie had plenty.
3. Depiction of a Zombie Removing Someone's Bellybutton Ring: Need I say more?
4. Depiction of Zombies: I suppose I should have known they'd be in it, but I was still pleasantly surprised.
5. A Zombie Clown: Yessir, a zombie clown. There is nothing funny about someone with a nickname being eaten, unless he is being eaten by a zombie. I mean, clown.There was one thing that disappointed me about this magnificent spectacle of modern filmmaking: As I was walking into the theater, two teenage girls walked in behind me. One says to the other, "Is this the right theater?"
"I don't know, the thing outside didn't say what number it is." And I just thought to myself, This is gonna be great! They won't figure out that Herbie or Bewitched or whatever is next door until they've already seen mass zombie carnage and head explosions. I can't wait!"
But then, to my utter horror, "Land of the Dead" appears on the screen and they're still sitting there. And they loved it. I should have asked for their numbers, seeing as a girl who likes zombie movies and is attractive will do just fine for me. But no, I didn't do that either. DAMNIT. But anyways, back to the ass-kissing. Go see this movie. And if you are my neighbor, stop screaming.