xXx: Why I Love Black People

Currently Listening To: Country Grammar/Basket Case by Green Day vs. Nelly

1996: The world is saved from aliens by Will Smith, which he repeats twice more.
1998: Wesley Snipes fends off a vampire takeover, which he as well repeats. Twice.
2004: Robots try to take over the world, despite what the white man says, and the day is again saved by the Fresh Prince.
Where would the world be without paranoid black people? We would be ruled by alien vampire robots. Boy would that suck. So I rented xXx: State of the Union tonight. I was worried it would suck. All through the movie, I was saying, "Please don't suck, please don't suck." When it was through, I jumped up and shouted "THANK GOD IT DIDN'T SUCK," but then I realized that it hadn't started yet. It was actually pretty good, though, in all honesty. It's about a general who wants to kill everyone with more power than him so he can be president. I guess he wants to make America perfect or something, but whatever. Anyways, he plans to do this by using his own private army to do this, and he's going to frame a bunch of black guys to cover it all up. It was like I was back in the 70's watching Shaft or some other blaxploitation movie. So it was great. If you don't know what blaxploitation is, just think of Undercover Brother, but not a comedy. By the end of this movie, I was ready to go out and KILL WHITEY. But I didn't. So basically, it's the first one, but with rap music instead of skater crap, and there was actually a point behind all the blowing crap up. So now we have "2005: Ice Cube saves whitey from whitey." Black people are awesome because the Man is always bringing him down, yet they still don't mind saving the day. All they ask for in return is a sequel.

And Samuel Jackson is a badass.